
The Cycling Carnival of Love is a mix of road riding and off road riding, whatever takes our fancy. This blog is an evolution of a much earlier blog, which was the seed of an idea, slightly misunderstood, but those that were involved in those early days will hopefully contribute in the same anarchic and random style that gave it a unique style. Let the Carnival begin...
Thursday, 19 July 2012
London to Whitstable (in two stages) cycle route 1
Update... I have since completed this route twice, once on a singlespeed (ouch) and last time on a geared mountain bike. The geared mountain bike was best! It was just over eighty miles and a great day's ride. If I pick things up from the account above where we bailed out at Sittingbourne the town after Sittingbourne is Faversham and the track becomes more of a shale kind of track that is nicely traffic free. From Faversham it is on through the Graveney marshes and Whitstable is visible in the distance with the sea on the left. It is strange riding towards such a familiar landmark having started riding nearly eighty miles away, having made it across Whitstable it was down to the beach for a well earned beer and barbecue, perfect.
Friday, 29 June 2012
Two wheeled carnival video
Been a bit AWOL this week, making a whole bunch of new videos. All shot with my phone so I apologise for all the missed calls as I can't film and phone at the same time!
Here is a little video that we made, some of you may recognise some of the scenery!
Woodland ride video
Here is a little video that we made, some of you may recognise some of the scenery!
Woodland ride video
Tuesday, 19 June 2012
Romney Marsh, Emus, Napoleonic war, abandoned churches and a man with a cravat
The spirit of the two wheeled carnival is growing, so much so that one of our group (who is known for his outstanding organisation skills) suggested "doing something different". When he added "we will just have a rough plan and see what happens" we knew it was going to be a great ride.
The rough plan was to follow the Military Canal from Hythe and see where it takes us, that was it, how much trouble could we get into by following a canal?
The four of us arrived at Hythe in the stealthy black van with bikes and gear on board, the atmosphere was of a distinct military nature as not only were we following a military canal but we had parked alongside the live firing range of the British Army with a backing group of high velocity snipers practicing shooting things.
We soon spun along to the start of the route with a cheerful toot, toot from the little steam train that chugs across the marsh. Within five minutes we were being berated by a local for daring to share the same piece of the planet as hers at he same time she wanted to use it. We cheerfully greeted her and left her raging and bewildered and probably writing to the local paper as we speak.
The cycle path here is the standard issue of gritty shale type paths so beloved by local authorities with a bit of lottery cash to spend. What was not standard issue was the Emu on the right. Yes, I did say Emu, a full size, live Emu pecking about in the Kent countryside, something to do with the Port Lympne zoo we figured out, still an Emu!
The gritty trail soon petered out as no one expects people to ride more than about six miles so from here it was a bit of cheeky freestyle through the countryside aided by Garmin hi tech satellites.
What did we spot in the distance? Obelisk. A big one. Right up on the hill. Be rude not to go and have a look. A quick detour had us at the foot of a very impressive column of stone with a gold pointy bit at the top. It was literally in the middle of nowhere, just sitting there obelisking at no one in particular. It was erected in 1834 in memory of Sir William Cosway and has a pretty impressive view of the surrounding countryside.
Onwards and weaving through a gaggle of ramblers without incident we pick up the canal once more and push on through fields of skinhead sheep, long grass and errr sheep shit, which sticks to tyres like errrr sheep shit does.
Then... Portaloo. In the middle of a field near an old church. No houses. No people, Just a field, a church and a Portaloo. Unusual. Then... a Marquee. Something must be up, we are miles from anywhere in the most open and desolate spot deep on Romney Marsh, Why is there a Portaloo and a Marquee here? A bit further on we find enlightenment in the form of a charming old gentlemen who is wearing a cravat and cordoning off a portion of field. A quick conversation reveals that this is the site of the annual raft race at Bonnington and this is the preparation for the big event taking place tomorrow. It is quite a star studded event by local standards as Julian Clarey and Paul O'Grady live nearby and both are due to attend. The day just gets more surreal.
With some helpful directions from our new found friend with the cravat we carry on alongside the canal, crossing fields of wheat instead of skinhead sheep.
From here we encounter the ever popular right of way that goes through someones garden. You know the type that buys a house with a right of way passing through their garden and then spends the ensuing decades making it look private and forbidding stressing themselves into a frenzy if anyone merely looks in the direction of the path. We crossed the garden past the beware of the dog signs, through 14 gates and chains (slight exaggeration) and safely out the other side.
Then we found the church... It looked like it was abandoned, the weeds outside were shoulder height and the gravestones had been absorbed by a mini New Romney rain forest. An abandoned church in the middle of nowhere, who would not want a bit of an explore?
The first door was locked, as was the second and third. A small door on the North side was worth a try. The handle turned and the door opened. I expected a flock of bats to fly out followed by a wide eyed wild haired woman with bony fingers and a scythe. What we found was a perfectly preserved, beautiful little church, complete with altar, pews and organ. Really, really unexpected, we respectfully had a quick look around and left, quite in awe of what we had just found. A quick bit of research revealed this to be the church at Snave, known as "the remote church" dating from the 13th century and declared redundant in 1984. It has since been maintained by the Romney Marsh Historic Churches Trust. Awesome church, just need to cut the grass a bit more.
A bit more Garmin assisted navigation led us across some bumpy wheat fields and onto some little lanes, where we caught and passed a guy riding what looked like his twelve year old daughter's bike. The surprising thing was he sped up and kept on our tail for about 2 or 3 miles. They breed them fit out there on the Marsh, must be all that fresh air and high winds or nuclear spider bites or something.
With the ride almost over it was a quick stop in Dymchurch for a bite to eat and a drink and then a fast spin back to the van and civilisation. What more can you ask of a ride that gives you, live military target practice, angry woman, Emu, Obelisk, man with cravat, abandoned churches and a high speed pursuit by a man on a girl's bike - you could not make this stuff up! Thanks Gor, great suggestion, we should do more of this :)
Wednesday, 13 June 2012
Zen and the art of Cycle Maintenance.
Zen and the art of Motorcycle Maintenance is a book we have often discussed on our rides. Though not for a while now, but something happened last week that reminded me of that special problem solving approach you need when trying to identify mechanical misbehaviour.
Easy to diagnose a loose crank arm...it squeaks and rocks on the bottom bracket spindle when you jiggle it from side to side. I was a little agitated that I would round off the inside of my pedal arm so that it would never ever fit properly again. So I stopped at cycle shop mid ride for a running repair (kindly carried out for free) by a geezer in a cycle shop in Sandwich. I had tried to tighten it myself earlier in the day to find it was already tight? So I asked the geezer to take off the arm, clean up the faces and tighten it back on......no worries....went back on and it seemed nice and tight. But soon after continuing on home the noises increased and a baggy pedal arm got worse and worse. So much so that any thoughts of silver foil to pack out a 'little play' seemed hopeless. The gap in the pedal stroke felt as big as a missing tooth in your mouth. My colleagues kindly suggesting that hairy string and gaffer tape would make a handsome repair in keeping with the rest of the accessories on my bike. Which would not look out of place leaning against the milking shed in 3 inches of silage!
I had resigned myself to having a confrontation with the supplier of this pedal arm, as it was brand new along with a whole transmission replacement. I took it into the shop and and explained what was wrong. He tried it on a handy bottom bracket and concluded nothing was wrong and the wear on the inside of the arm was in no way proportional to what I was describing. I don't think you need you need an arm at all. Put it back on your bike, and bring it back so we can see.
The long and short of it is.........is actually long. After hands on experiments the conclusion could only be that the bolt which tightens the arm to the spindle is a fraction too long. It tightens but hits the bottom of the threaded hole in the spindle just before firming up the arm, so your tightening sensation is there, but not onto the interface between crank arm and spindle! So a shorter bolt is now fitted and all that is required is a test ride? Haven't done that as yet, on my to do list.
ZEN like powers of perception required.... as a new pedal arm was a fag paper away from being purchased for only the problem to repeat again, as I would have used the same bolt to secure it.
Robert Persig wrote the book and its sequel Lila, and I heartily recommend them both to this house, and my right honourable friends, who for the moment can keep their tape.
Zen and the art of cycle maintenance. |
Easy to diagnose a loose crank arm...it squeaks and rocks on the bottom bracket spindle when you jiggle it from side to side. I was a little agitated that I would round off the inside of my pedal arm so that it would never ever fit properly again. So I stopped at cycle shop mid ride for a running repair (kindly carried out for free) by a geezer in a cycle shop in Sandwich. I had tried to tighten it myself earlier in the day to find it was already tight? So I asked the geezer to take off the arm, clean up the faces and tighten it back on......no worries....went back on and it seemed nice and tight. But soon after continuing on home the noises increased and a baggy pedal arm got worse and worse. So much so that any thoughts of silver foil to pack out a 'little play' seemed hopeless. The gap in the pedal stroke felt as big as a missing tooth in your mouth. My colleagues kindly suggesting that hairy string and gaffer tape would make a handsome repair in keeping with the rest of the accessories on my bike. Which would not look out of place leaning against the milking shed in 3 inches of silage!
I had resigned myself to having a confrontation with the supplier of this pedal arm, as it was brand new along with a whole transmission replacement. I took it into the shop and and explained what was wrong. He tried it on a handy bottom bracket and concluded nothing was wrong and the wear on the inside of the arm was in no way proportional to what I was describing. I don't think you need you need an arm at all. Put it back on your bike, and bring it back so we can see.
The long and short of it is.........is actually long. After hands on experiments the conclusion could only be that the bolt which tightens the arm to the spindle is a fraction too long. It tightens but hits the bottom of the threaded hole in the spindle just before firming up the arm, so your tightening sensation is there, but not onto the interface between crank arm and spindle! So a shorter bolt is now fitted and all that is required is a test ride? Haven't done that as yet, on my to do list.
ZEN like powers of perception required.... as a new pedal arm was a fag paper away from being purchased for only the problem to repeat again, as I would have used the same bolt to secure it.
Robert Persig wrote the book and its sequel Lila, and I heartily recommend them both to this house, and my right honourable friends, who for the moment can keep their tape.
Sunday, 10 June 2012
carniGor is now posting two wheeled love to the spinning masses
Is this what you mean by a Two Wheeled Carnival of love?.
Well I seem to be the filling in the sandwich whilst Bazza was yet again trying to tell us that tubeless was the new way for the noughties.
Hmmmm well he was enjoying all the pumping as I seem to remember and we got to get a rest break every 20 yards.
Tuesday, 29 May 2012
Quick release Michaelmas Daisies
Saturday arrived as usual, after Friday in the natural rhythm of things - perhaps it would be interesting, once in a while, to mix things up a bit and maybe cancel a Friday or add in an extra day called Spareday, just to break up the monotony of the seven day sequence. This may upset the religiousists, but that is not necessarily a bad thing. The sad reality of this fantastic commercial world that we live in any Spareday would be sponsored and re-branded PepsiMaxfillyouupwithsugarandmakeyourheadspinroundday and there is just no more space in my life for any more big company intrusion, so let's scrub round that particular idea.
No. I have thought some more about this - why do we give the days names at all? Not very logical really, why not use numbers? Start from a point in history, say the dinosaurs and number each day sequentially from there? The dinosaurs were around about 250 million years ago give or take the odd million years, so that would make today 91,250,000,000,000 or 9125 to the power of 10. Now that is a really big number, admittedly not as big as Graham's number, but probably a bit too big for day to day use. As a positive we would not have to bother counting years anymore, which would be quite neat. Probably better is to find a point in more recent history, say when the Beatles' Sgt. Pepper album came out, which was 1st June 1967. That would make today 16,666. No that is still not working for me, I can see now why they arrived at names now, there was some thought put into things after all. What about some more descriptive names? No, let's just leave it, we could never agree with Crapday or Staybedday or even worse - Golfday, shudders...
So, Saturday, being Saturday, the day that follows Friday, in the conventional sense, means bike ride day. And bike ride day means rounding up as many like minded souls for a bimble around the lanes bringing our version of carnival to the good people of the villages and towns we pass through. This week's round up yielded... One! The other roundees offered a myriad of excuses, including "the dog ate your text" and "I have fallen over whilst fetching a pint of milk" a couple of real keepers for sure. So Rob and I rolled out of Herne Bay, over the bridge of enlightenment and headed for the well ridden route of Cycle route 1. Cycle route 1 is a marvelous route that runs from the Shetland Isles to Dover, or maybe the other way round - I guess the Shetland people would say it starts in Shetland and the Dover people are all too fat and feckless to ride bikes so could not care less. I am going to go with "it starts in Shetland".
Of course we were not going to ride the whole of it, just a little itty bit that runs to Deal, via the town of Sandwich, nice and flat see? Our specific destination was the cycle centre and bike racing track at Fowlmead, for the local delicacy of a "Miner's Muffin" (sausage, egg and a slice of slimy cheese in a bun) stupid name, but let's not go on about the names of things again, it really does not matter.
No really it does, sorry I can't just let this pass. It is called a Miner's Muffin because the site is on top of an old colliery. Now this is wrong in so many ways:
1. The café sign says "Miners Muffin" no apostrophe see, the pedant and OCD that is sadly and deeply rooted inside me smugly goes "that's wrong"
2. The bun is made of a kind of "Mother's Pride" bread and is definitely NOT a muffin
3. They must have thought - hey, we want something catchy let's call it a Miner's something as we are on top of an old colliery, Ooohh, that's clever, I like what you did there with the miner - colliery thing there, very subtle, hmmm let's use alliteration, that will make it sell, hmmm word beginning with M, what about Muffin? Well it's not a Muffin. Hmmm, can't think of another one, let's go with Muffin, people are pretty stupid and won't notice. OK "Miners Muffin" it is then. What about one of those apostrophe things? Hmmm, should it go before or after the "s'. Hmmm, don't know, let's just leave it out then, people are pretty stupid and probably won't notice. OK, chalk it up then.
Now another cycling venue, that obviously gets the cycling thing, does a similar type of sandwich bap thing (better ingredients) and calls it a M.O.A.B (Mother of all Breakfasts). This works as cyclists get the reference to Utah and a tasty snack. Anyway, having thought about it and saw them deep frying the sausages at Fowlmead I decided that I would boycot the "Miners Muffin" this week and have tea instead. Didn't stop Rob though, he tucked in and used the magic of brown sauce to counteract and neutralise the cheese nastiness that lurks in the errrrr thing.
Back to the ride - the weather was great, beautiful May sunshine, clear skies and a bit of a breeze, the miles clicked down quite quickly at nice steady pace. Steady that is until a local club swept past us in a local business sponsored peleton, kind of like a fast moving Thompson Local. Now I have known Rob for nearly ten years and I have learned many things from him, from Pink Floyd to Aboriginal art. But there is one thing that I do know about Rob as a rider is that he is what I call a "chaser". Rob will chase anything, from a milk float to a double decker bus. Never mind that he never catches them, it does not seem to put him off one bit. The mobile Thompson Local peleton that swept past us was too much temptation. Way too much. The eager greyhound that lurks inside Rob woke up suddenly, pricked up his ears and raced off after the hare, landing amongst them, to continue the dog metaphor, like an excited Labrador puppy. The peleton closed around him and there he was, enveloped. I sat at the back to see how things were going to pan out, I never tire of watching Rob chase down his prey. These guys were probably in their early twenties, if you added the speed we were doing to their age you would arrive at a number closer to our respective age. The ratio of speed to age was a nice symmetrical number (my OCD likes them) say 25:25, we were giving away 25 years and trying to maintain 25mph. I did not feel in a good place, Rob was certainly in a much worse place, enveloped in the 25mph peleton. We needed a dignified way out. Mine came in the next fork in the road, I needed to go left, trouble was the peleton envelope with Rob inside went right. I think it took him five miles to catch me up.
The peleton despatched we spun through the lanes and through the little town of Sandwich, which passed without event or altercation, probably because Bazza was not there. With Sandwich behind us it was through the toll road, over the golf course into the backstreets of Deal and onto Fowlmead. The back way into Fowlmead means you pass through a gate, the sign on the gate says "this gate closes at 8pm". Why? How? It makes no sense and off goes the pedant again - This gate is closed at 8pm, how hard was that? Does it matter? Not really. Is it important? Not really, I probably should get out more.
A quick lap around the circuit gratuitously overtaking Apollos and Tesco bikes feeling pathetically superior but really looking like a couple of sad middle age wannabees had us back at the café for the now infamous Miner's Muffin. A quick scout around and a look at the deserted pump track and we were on our way homeward discussing of all things Corten steel, a material much beloved by artists including Antony Gormley the Angel of the North artist. The conversation turned to why Corten does not rust like other mild steels and the answer is interestingly:
"Weathering" means that due to their chemical compositions, these steels exhibit increased resistance to atmospheric corrosion compared to other steels. This is because the steel forms a protective layer on its surface under the influence of the weather.
The corrosion-retarding effect of the protective layer is produced by the particular distribution and concentration of alloying elements in it. The layer protecting the surface develops and regenerates continuously when subjected to the influence of the weather. In other words, the steel is allowed to rust in order to form the 'protective' coating.
Thanks Wikipedia.
The route home was a bit of a freestyle navigate through the lanes that got us to Wingham which was decked out like a 1950's chocolate box with bunting and flags out, something to do with a jubilee thing. I try and stop images of guillotines on The Mall, at least there were no signs to read.
A bit of climbing dispensed with the Wingham 1952 timewarp and it was on to Grove Ferry where we picked up the peleton on the way out. More climbing, a bit more climbing and then some more got us to the outskirts of Herne Bay, note to self: move somewhere where it is not uphill all the way back.
And we are back in the room - being Herne Bay a ride would not be complete without some abuse being hurled at us from a car and today's ride did not disappoint. What is it with fat women in cheap, nearly new, crappy little hatchback cars that feel obliged to toot, wind down the window and deliver an incoherent rant at a few cyclists? They are so full of anger and hate and probably make all those signs that so jar my sensitivities. I can forgive you for the signs, just please stop yelling at me. Peace.
Friday, 25 May 2012
It's about Geography - or is it?
Not the kind of geography that Mr Higgins used to teach back in form five, none of that terminal moraine and nimbus stratus stuff, although I guess that kind of comes into it. No, I am talking about the sense of where you are both geographically, topographically, perhaps even where your place is in the Cosmos.Basically a sense of where you live and what is around you. One of my co-contributors to this blog, OK, at the moment the only co-contributor to this blog, lent me a great book called "the Lost Art of Pedestrianism by Geoff Nicholson (must remember to give it back). The book is a rambling collection of musings and well rambles, both mental and physical in which the author details his need to walk as a means of getting in touch with where he is and derives a great sense of self and contact with other human souls.
Biking for me is very much like that, we live in an area on the North Kent coast between Herne Bay and Whitstable in Kent. The area we ride in takes in a wide area from Wye, high on the North Downs, to the dense forest that embraces Canterbury down to the marshes that run from Fordwich over to the small town of Sandwich.
By riding the lanes, the highways, the byeways and the terrain and experiencing the weather first hand from freezing winter to balmy summer you get a real sense of place, nature and topography. The rides add a different dimension in the many conversations that riders in the carnival have, from the chit chat about work to the outright wacky, and dare I say it, often made up, philosophical meanderings from Nietzsche to Aristotle and every bit in between - the conversations provide a kind of bullshit kaleidoscope through which to view the ride unfolding - wouldn't have it any other way.
I have grown to love these rides, they have become, without exaggeration, something that I have to do, each one weaves more knowledge of where I live, building up into a fabric that places me precisely in my locale as well as the universe itself. To twist the words, very slightly, of the great man Mr. Armstrong, "it is not about the bike" and also Mr Higgins, it is not about geography. No, it is bigger than that, far, far bigger.
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